I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
