Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Randomize
