i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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