Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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