how can u be prego again
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.