She said her name was "party"
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
