...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
we're chasing vodka with high fives
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
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well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
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School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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