I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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