so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
