Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize