I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize
