I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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