She went from zero to smokin in five shots
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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