Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Randomize
