when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
