garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
