They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize