this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
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