My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize