he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize