its not stalking. its research.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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