I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Randomize
