David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
that is very illegal...i love you.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
