He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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