What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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