please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
do herpes really smell.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
