I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
