i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
