stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
