Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
