I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Randomize
