i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
