I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
