he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize