I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize