I smell stomach acid.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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