we made out on top of his cat.
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Randomize
