shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
