How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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