did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
