Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
