Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
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Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
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Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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