I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i dont even know how to be here
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
