I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I wear drunk well.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
