so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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