I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
