You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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