the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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