how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Randomize