Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize