Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I cockslap morals
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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